Copyrights, corporations and commercials

If you use Firefox, you might have stumbled across a few sites that deliberately block you for using Firefox. Welcome to the corporate-controlled Internet, my friend. Apparently, you forgot to RTFM, and the M is here: www.whyfirefoxisblocked.com. WhyFirefoxIsBlocked.com is a site that tries- pathetically- to explain why some sites practice this despicable (and legally questionable, one hopes) form of discrimination. The overall answer is simple, if a bit illogical: Firefox includes ad-blocking software, and Mozilla sponsors Ad-Block Plus (which I STRONGLY recommend getting!).
So this is The Man's way of sticking it back to us. Consequently, you're stuck using Internet Explorer (or, if you use Linux, Konqueror or Epiphany, which aren't nearly as bad as IE), leaving you open to not only ads, but viruses and hackers, because, from the site, "millions of hard working people are being robbed of their time and effort by this type of software"! Oh noes! You're actually harming the people who write ads by using a better browser! And we can't have that, can we?
It goes on to call these semi-humans who develop ads "honest, hard-working website owners and developers". Propaganda at its best- you can't get much better than this. They call ad-blocking "resource theft" over and over- as if the ads aren't stealing our resources (bandwidth- pages with no ads load much faster than pages with an average number of ads). The fact remains that, no matter how many "honest, hard-working" speechwriters helped make this elegant piece of slander, it's still nothing more than FUD (Fear, Uncertainty, Denial), designed to keep you from making your own choices about what sites you want to visit, and how you want to visit them.
So, what do we do?
I suggest just using FireFox as usual, with one difference. The User Agent Switcher makes your browser looks like IE or any other browser to a server, effectively screwing over any form of browser-bouncer. But another good idea is to shove their own words back down their throats: if a site forces you to not use Firefox, then just don't go there. Boycott them. See how they like it. WhyFirefoxIsBlocked says that blocking Firefox doesn't cause much financial loss, but with more users switching every day, that's not going to be true anymore in a while. Eventually, they'll have no choice but to unblock us. Or maybe not- we are talking about big, stubborn corporations here.
From MEPIS 7.0,
The DistRogue.

Digg: The Red(mond) Army Strikes Again! OH NOES!

Momsshizzle might seem like a normal Digg user. (Yeah, right...) Except that he has no friends (according to Digg, that is, and probably in real life). Except for his deceptive avatar of Firefox munching away on the IE6 logo. Except that it looks like his only purpose is to post something along the lines of "Linsux linsux linsux. Linsux. LIIIIINSUUUUX!!!!!11111oneoneone" on any Linux-related article he finds. You see, momsshizzle is part of Microsoft's growing botnet of poor souls on Digg who post crap in any Linux-related articles they find.
I'm guessing Microsoft pays him to do it, and it's obvious why: there's no other reason.
Really, if he was a Windows fanboy, you'd think he'd have an intelligent argument ready (or maybe not...). Maybe he was trying to start a meme. If that's the case, congratulations, momssshizzle, you just killed your own meme. Nice job! But really, what could make a human being give up all their dignity by making posts that skull-crushingly lame and pointless other than money?
These people need to learn that there are better ways of making money than sucking up to Microsoft and talking crap about an OS they've obviously never used before. How's this for an idea: Actually try "Linsux" out (GASP!!!), blog about it, and make some money off the ad revenue. Oh, Microsoft's paying you not to use it so that you never learn anything about it that might (shudder at the thought) change your opinion? OK, your loss.
And momsshizzle, if you're reading this, and you post a comment, if you use the word "Linsux", it will be deleted on sight. It was kind-of-sort-of funny the first 42 times you said it, but move on. Your little meme failed.
To the rest of the botnet, quoting Linus himself: "Put up or shut up."
From MEPIS 7.0(still!)-rc2,
The DistRogue.

Startup times

Something weird just happened. I'm at school, and a lot of the laptops we use run Vista. So, I took the opportunity to clock how long it takes Vista to start up versus Linux. Here are some of the results:
PCLinuxOS 2007 (on my home laptop, a middle-of-the-road machine): 40 seconds
Mandriva 2008: 40 seconds
Xubuntu 7.10: 45 seconds
openSUSE 10.3 (clean install, OSS/KDE): about 45 seconds
Fedora 8: about 50 seconds (a huge improvement over the last few versions :-)
Windows Vista: 3 minutes 45 seconds
...What?
That's what I got after 3 consecutive reboots. Sad, isn't it? These are modern laptops, not ancient Pentium IIIs, and they run AMD Sempron 3500+s with 896MB RAM.
Sorry you have to read this, I just had to get that out.
From Windows Fista (Rubber Glove edition),
The Distrogue.

Remember them?

The site Show Us the Code, that challenged Microsoft to show us the code that they based their patent violations on, was shut down by the webmaster's employer. Bullying prevailed, and freedom of speech was destroyed by the very corporate format that the site railed against.
Someone needs to pick up the torch. Someone who is independent from corporations. Someone without a job. Someone who can crusade for Linux no matter what. Someone who is never afraid to speak their mind. Someone who can lead. If you want to free Linux from Microsoft's FUD campaign, be my guest. Be our guest. By all means, shout Microsoft down.
From Xubuntu 7.04,
The DistRogue.

A newbie's guide to Windows Vista

I apologize in advance for any eye or brain injuries you might receive from reading this parody.

Are you ready to upgrade to the latest and greatest version of Microsoft "All your crash are belong to us" Windows? Well, here's everything you need to know:
-New artwork! We have a ripped-off completely new icon theme with Vista, and we've even changed the look of the little bar at the bottom! It looks shinier now, and that's all that matters!
-New effects! Look at all the shiny stuff! Vista has a new Alt-Tab switcher which nobody uses, a new Aero(tm) theme ripped off from KDE's "Crystal" windeco, and Windows Flip 3D which the Mac has had for years as Exposé!!! We know these don't matter to anyone with half a brain, but it's all shiny and we use a lot of exclamation points!!!!!!!!!!1111 So go out and buy the Ultimate Edition for all the shiny stuff that you could get for free, but better, on Linux!
-Easier to use! Okay, so it's not really easier to use, but we're the marketing department! Believe us... It's easier than evar!!!!!!!11111oneoneone
-More secure! Remember all those people yakking about DRMs? Well, they lied! We have DRMs in Vista, but they're not to cripple your rights! They're there so you can enjoy a nice, buggy secure "Wow!" experience and not be bothered by bad men who exploit flaws we were too lazy to patch!!! Aren't we smaaart? Smarter than those Linux egocentrics who think their OS is better than anyone else's just because it just works better than ours?
All you need to have your "Wow!" start now is a Beowulf cluster of Core 2 Duo-based computers overclocked to 4GHz which is impossible since Vista has no clustering support, and a minimum of 8GB of RAM per system. That's low! The best Linux has to offer is 26GB idle! Oh, wait, that's 26MB, not GB, and an LFS-based desktop could probably go even lower... If you're still using that Core Solo 1.66GHz you bought last year, it's out of date, go get a new computer! Don't you feel sorry for those little Linux kids zipping by on their 800MHz Celeron laptops which you can, contrary to belief, actually use as a workstation? You want power! Don't try to deny it, you want those shiny new Aero effects! Compiz actually runs (relatively well, too) on said laptops...
Now, be a good little brainwashed Microsoftie and go out there and buy Vista... Because if you don't, we'll have it on every computer you buy by the end of 2007! Make your "Wow" start now. Wow! As in, "Wow, it took them five years to make this???"
From Windows Vista!!!
omgwtfbbq teh 1337-|)!57|206|_|3!